Monday, March 17, 2014

thoughts and a new journey.

image via. 
Hello Everyone! 
You may have noticed that I have been on a bit of a blogging hiatus, and before my hiatus that I had been posting rather inconsistently. The reason? you may ask. Well the reason is this post. This post is something I have been thinking about for a while, and it may seem inconsequential as a majority of my blog followers are my friends (love you!) but as this blog originally started as a creative outlet for myself, I think I owe it to myself (and any of you readers) that I explain. In the past few months I came to a slow realization that something about this blog and the blogging community I came to love and read every day was just off. Around the same time I came to a realization in myself that I was focusing on the wrong things here, and even more so that my focus in this blog-o-sphere was leading me to make unhealthy decisions in my life. Not unhealthy in a literal-bodily way (not referring to drugs, food or alcohol) but still unhealthy. Don't get me wrong, I still believe that style blogs can be an excellent creative outlet and source of inspiration. But for me I found that it was leading me down this overly material path, where I was spending more than I wanted to on things I neither needed or wanted. I found that reading certain blogs everyday just made me wish and want more--this can be seen in every style bloggers frequent "wish list" and "gift guide" posts--something that has become and unfortunate trope in the style blog world, in my opinion. 

In the process of this self realization, I decided to purge. Purge my closet of all of the things I did not wear, need or even truly want; realizing that even after this I still have much more than I truly need and certainly much more than most 22-year-olds around the world. I then decided to seriously reform my spending habits, this has not been an easy task and will certainly be a difficult journey as I (like many others, I suspect) now see that I was using shopping as an emotional outlet. I want to only be buying things when they are needed, with the rare shopping for fun trip with friends. I've started using mint.com to help me track me spending and my debts, and seeing now that amount of money I used on just shopping...it's ridiculous. I've always thought of myself as someone who is globally minded, with a heart for those in need or who are less privileged than myself--and now truly seeing the amount of privilege I have, I can literally see by looking at my spending habits just how many hungry people I could have fed had I not gone to Target that one time, or how many mothers I could have provided safe birthing kits to if I had not gone to the Gap that other time, or how I could have contributed to building a school where there was no access to education--I am truly dumb-struck by it. 

Because of this I felt the need to bring this slow self-realization back to this blog and also to the blogs that I follow. I am not necessarily advocating that everyone out there with a designer handbag or and excellent shoe collection get rid of all of their things and never buy anything nice again. But I did want to share with you how seeing others everyday with these things has led me to lose focus of what I actually care about and what my true passions are. Being almost a year out of school now I can see what really made me happy in school was being able to read, write and have in depth discussions about what was going on in the world around me. I still love beautiful things, and I do believe that dressing up for a day at work can make you feel better about yourself--and with today's media I think this is extremely important. But I have learned the need to but this love for beauty in perspective, and perhaps to even redefine beauty for myself. Considering my needs, and what I most value in my life--my friends, family, my education, the gift of choice and liberation as a woman--I want to give those things to others (in the most non-colonial white privilege way possible, promise).

With all of this now off my chest, I want to share some changes that are going to be happening around here. I still plan on sharing my DIY projects with you all, and hopefully more of them! Crafting and making things your own is something that I truly enjoy, and often can be very affordable. I am also hoping to share some of my food adventures with you all, this is something that could be very entertaining, if you know me you know my cooking skills are questionable at best, but I want to learn and hopefully get away from boxed dinners. I also still plan on sharing inspiration with you, especially related to homes and lifestyles. As a young 20-something I am trying my best to make my living space a reflection of me, even with an almost exclusive collection of hand-me-downs, in this realm I think a little daydreaming can be healthy motivation. Where the big change will come however, is in the main posts. I don't plan on doing nearly as many outfit inspiration posts (though there may be some here and there), rather I plan on sharing my thoughts and frustrations with you. Things I love and find hopeful like the recent "Ban Bossy" campaign for young women and girls, things I find interesting like rebuttals to Sheryl Sandberg's "Lean In" or Barbies recent "Unapologetic" campaign. And things I find upsetting or believe need to be discussed which could include comments from your friendly GOP congressman or resurfacing gender stereotypes. 
These are the things that I am truly passionate about, and I don't want to lose site of them again or find them lost behind a blogger's Celine handbag. I won't be offended if you chose to un-follow or no longer read, but if this is a journey you think you might be interested in too, then please stick around. 

Heather 
ps: I promise to continue to instagram pictures of my dog 
and my extensive collection of Target shoes.